A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 31 Kayla, Without a Doubt My meetings with Dr. Kat were getting easier.  I still thought in advance about where she would lead me and how I would react.  Mostly, I thought about the question she asked me on my first visit, “why was I there”.  Initially, I thought it was about my sexual desires, but more and more as the weeks went by, I could clearly see that I was there for much more reason.  I guess it’s likely to assume that our past would get further and further away from us, as time naturally created space and distance.  Yet, somehow in my subconscious mind, time was just time.  I couldn’t help but to notice, that on more than one occasion, when I was leaving Dr. Kat’s office, she had called in a woman with the last name Johnson.  Given that Johnson had been my original maiden name, I would always think of my father when I heard the name.              Today when I stepped out into the large waiting area, which served as a nucle

A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 30 Kayla in Woods Shoes  Wood continued to attend church on Sundays.  I had accompanied him a hand full of times, but I just wasn’t there with God.  He didn’t allow it to break our bond, and gave me the space to sort out my feelings.  This Sunday I had gotten up early, and began looking for something to wear.  Once I knew what, I looked for a tie that would match my ensemble for Wood to wear.  In fact, I went ahead and ironed him a shirt too.  From there, I moved on to breakfast.  Nothing major—just scrambled eggs, toast, and fruit.  We arrived before the parking lot got crowded, and found a spot near the entrance.  I looked at the service bulletin, and saw that the message was titled “Healing is in Honesty”.  Right away, I thought about all the ways in which honesty had made way for my love with Wood to blossom into something truly healing.  I really didn’t have the words to express the effect his love and devotion had on me.  Even Ke

start the book now:  https://abetterpairofshoes.blogspot.com/2017/05/chapter-1-camies-secret.html A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 29 Tony Stumbles and Fall  She’d been hanging around the club quite a bit.  I couldn’t help but notice her.  She was tall and alluring, and her presence was bold and menacing.  She always showed up alone and never left with anyone— week after week.  She just seemed to really appreciate the music and the arts.  I did notice several regulars try to get to know her, and even took residence at her table from time to time, but she never seemed to blink or even appeared to be flattered by their company.  She smiled and made polite talk, but nothing.  Eventually, I thought maybe I would give it a shot.  I guess it’s just the male instinct to want to get in on the sport.  I knew I wasn’t trying to get into anything, but I decided to stick my head in.  I usually looked in on all the action in the club from my window upstairs and hardly ever wen

A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 27 and 28 Camie Gets Back to Motherhood I decided to take Hannah shopping for some things for her new bedroom.  On the way there, I was able to pick her brain and hear all about her life.  I was curious to learn more about her and know how things were going at school and at home.              “So, think you’ll invite any of the kids from school to your party on Sunday?”             “Yeah, I think Rebecca, Josie, and Summer.”             “Nice!  Well I’ll be sure to give you some invitations to hand out.”  It made me happy to know that Hannah had a group of friends.              “And how are you enjoying hanging out with your dad?”             “I like it.  He’s really cool.  We always go to the movies or wall climbing.”  Hannah’s eyes were lit up.”             “That sounds like fun for sure!”  I was delighted by how much Hannah was into her dad.                      “So, how’s everything at home?”                “Do you e

A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 26 Ketly Broken Again  I landed in LA at 7:55a.m.  I was all kinds of out of sorts.  For one, I had left Shayne back in Florida with my neighbor.  It was all so quick and panicked.  It wasn’t like me to get so comfortable so quickly, but I really trusted Raina.  I didn’t want to bring my sweet prince into what I perceived could be an awkward and shaky environment.  I had gotten an alarming call at nearly three in the morning, from one of Jeff’s infamous one-night stands, telling me that she had found him passed out in a tub of running water.  It sent chills all up and through my body, and wounded my already broken heart.  She explained that she had only met him for the first time earlier that morning.  She didn’t know who best to contact, but my number was labeled as “baby”.  I wondered if it was related to the way he felt about me, or to his son.  The news didn’t make any sense to me.  Jeff was successful, handsome, and definitel

start the book now: https://abetterpairofshoes.blogspot.com/2017/05/chapter-1-camies-secret.html A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 25 For the Love of Kayla I bet you’re wondering how I got here again; flat on my face.  Looking back, I think I lost my footing the moment I received the letter.  Although, I hadn’t officially fallen until I had met with Tony.  The truth was somehow determined to keep me grounded.  At least, this is what I could gather from the site where my wound had been reopened.  I pulled into the parking lot of the eight story bank building where my soon to be therapist was located.  Although her office was only four and a half miles from my house, I had set my alarm for six a.m.  I knew I would need enough time to get in the right state of mind.  I really didn’t know what to expect or how I would feel as I got closer to the hour; the moment.  I ended up turning off the alarm at four-thirty when I realized I wouldn’t go back to sleep.  I sat out

A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 24 Jeff Still Unfulfilled In my mind, she was arguably the sexiest woman I had ever pulled, but she hadn’t added anything to the shell I gave to her.  I remained unfulfilled.  It was nothing to do with her, or the sex we had shared, but this was not the life or woman I wanted.  Still, I tried to convince myself that this was where I needed to be—being true to myself, and not confining myself to a monogamous relationship.  Yet I felt drained.  I missed my friend and our love.  Everyday apart from her and my son left my heart weaker.  I was no good to myself.  In fact, I hadn’t written a single word in over two weeks, and although I had just finished writing my new book, my contract and schedule demanded that I keep writing.  I had tried showing up on her doorstep and begging her to take me back, but I wasn’t exactly built that way.  I knew I could get her in bed, but I didn’t know how to get her back—at least, not without making some r

A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 23 Camie’s Soul Tie I couldn’t take my eyes off of him.  He was more handsome than cute now.  He had a pull; an aura…something more.  I hadn’t seen it before through my fury, but now the ethers were clear, and the connection was becoming intoxicating.  I was entirely engulfed by his every move.  He glimpsed up a couple of times and smiled his sweet smile.  I couldn’t eat.  And I barely could sleep for two nights waiting to see him again.  At work my mind kept slipping off and then taking its sweet old time getting back.  I enjoyed having a dinner partner, and I didn’t want our date to end.  Things were surely starting to feel like they were coming together for me here at home.  I felt like I was regaining parts of me that I had lost.  I tried to figure out why Derek hadn’t tried to kiss me.  I wanted to remember his kisses, and feel his grown up hands on my skin but he never budged.             “You okay?  Why you so quiet?”  Derek

A Better Pair of Shoes, a novel Chapter 22 Aisha’s Old Wineskins Again I found myself standing face-to-face with Evan, the pharmacist from a week earlier.  I had just pulled into a gas station a few blocks away from the University.  He held the door open for me to enter the adjoined mini mart.  I felt embarrassed that I had not taken a second look at his note, but it was no secret that I was married.             “You never called.”  Evan had no seeming shame, fear of rejection, or the slightest fear of losing his employment.             “I’m married.”             “I am too.  I thought we could just talk you know.”  He quickly replied, and I highly doubted those were his intentions.              “Right, well you never know what can happen.”  I took the liberty of teasing Evan.              “Well in that case, I’ll keep waiting by the phone.  He teased back.  I moved pass Evan, and went ahead to grab a cup of coffee and pay for my gas. When I got home Tony was