(Click on the Image to open a clearer view)#ABPOS The Thinner Soul, Chp. 4
Radiance- Off years are fun; breakfast, brunch, dinner, a dog park with a friend for a walk, an over-zealous meeting with no real mind to get going. I've got sticky notes for days, stacked atop each other.. with horizontal sidelines and vertical bylines. It all just sits there until there comes a fire under your pants. I received a wedding dress eight years ago from him and it naturally ruined my tour. Finding that landing for the eyes, keeping the mind in one lane, pretending that maybe that night is the night that he comes to the edge of the stage and say "I told you so". Whether the fans felt the detachment or not, is unknown to me. I might have heard a rumor or two but I followed the real critics, and what felt like embarrassment to me was labeled endearing and empathetic. Way to throw off the truth.
He's been with me in five different countries and has surprised me with many Rose calls, but there's something that severed our bond way back there. I call it counsel. She calls it a raft. And Kaylin calls it grace.
These days the fire under my pants is the one whose ring I wear, and the tremor in my heart is the thought that there's no more road for Radiance Dunbar. Eaton? Well, he can be the dress hanger. And as for the number eight, you've never seen a wedding dress until you've seen a dress from Eight up close. The shimmer, the perfection of seams, the choice of stones and beaderies. I don't know how I walked it to the trash two times, but it happens.. and easily when there's a barricade in your life that keeps you locked in and just about everyone locked out. He came boldly when I was hanging her back up, and whether he thinks I'm hiding a guy in my closet or not.. Nobody goes in there and I do mean nobody. Likewise, I'm not allowed in his bathroom. Maybe he thinks I'm questioning, but I've found that equality has a positive effect on relationships. Problem is there's no equality in the sentiments that they leave behind. One's working on it, and one was born with it. One deals in contracts, and one writes contracts. But a steady presence comes with no flaw at forty or even thirty-nine. And with John he's probably more opt to pick out my shoes and leave the dress behind. So, four months to the big countdown and all my prayers are that he doesn't find out about my fierce heart and leave me at the altar in just a pair of shoes.
#ABPOS The Thinner Soul, Chp. 5
Reece- Just yesterday we were Ample Records and now all anyone ever talks about is the blog. The deal was good. It took us into a universe of our own, but blood is thicker than water and she did cut him. They both did, and I didn't know how much of him was still in me. Although, no one ever knows how he gets to her or why they're the bigger family. I suppose it doesn't matter. Just like Sam keeps his background as safe keeping, so do I.. and our family is the bigger family still. It just ended up that way. He never budged. But Sam, Jeff, and I keep Ample alive in all its trades and traits. Speaking of traits; Radiance is trying to get her surf on the boards again. I'm not setup to get in her way, only to keep the blog a part of everyone's concerns. We're Ample; Independent Royalty.. and we call record royalties. That's what K-Ezra needs to know and all her fans. I still look over the contract she wrote, from time to time, and that's contract royalty. I just couldn't see Kaylin's color green coming; and the savior, she's got fans you don't want to touch. But nobody sees the roadways up this high, and it's all a learner's game. There are no teachers.. only learners and fans.
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